I suspect my wife of having a lesbian affair after finding different size bra
DEAR DEIDRE: I WAS doing the crossword, bent down to pick up a pen that rolled under the bed and found a bra which was a 40D. My wife wears a 36C.
Obviously, I was puzzled. So I asked my wife how it got there. She came up with some story that she and some friends were trying on dresses they ordered online together and one of them must have left it there.
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That doesn’t make sense. We’ve been together for 15 years and had a great sex life until six months ago, when she turned cold. I am 51 and she is 46.
The bra incident came about three months ago but has been eating into me ever since. I’m worried she is having an affair with a woman. Perhaps I am being paranoid but she gets angry if I mention it.
DEIDRE SAYS: If your wife had a female lover, it is unlikely she would go home without her bra.
But women trying on dresses might well bring a change of bra, as different styles demand different underpinning. Your wife could just be irritated at your assumption.
But something has gone wrong if your wife has stopped wanting sex. Tell her you love her, you miss the intimacy and ask what needs to change. It is probably something that can be sorted.