QOTD: Can You Build an Ideal Crapwagon Garage? (Part VII: Vans)

Corey Lewis
by Corey Lewis

In last week’s Crapwagon Garage QOTD, we combined truck and station wagon to create an SUV, picking five winners. In part VII of the series, we’ll combine truck and station wagon a bit differently and end up with a van.

That’s right, it’s time for some (ugh). Car-based minivans also apply, so we’re not limited to things like the sweet Safari GT above.

This week, the Forgettable Favorite Award goes to:

Ajla (again) and JohnTaurus’ suggestion, the Isuzu VehiCROSS. Concept styling meets capable SUV in a vehicle which is already commanding more money than other similar vintage used vehicles. Special recognition goes to the rarer Ironman Edition versions with their different paint colors. Delightful, and you probably won’t lose money if you keep it a while.

On to the vans! Let’s review the rules:

  1. A crapwagon must be a vehicle which is relatively easy to find and purchase using an internet.
  2. All vehicles in the crapwagon garage must have been sold as new, in the North American market.
  3. Said vehicles must be obtainable to the casual crapwagon collector (CCC). This means in clean, running condition each one asks $7,000 or less on a normal day.
  4. Your suggestions must fit into the vehicle category of the week. If you don’t like the category, that’s tough. We’ll get to a category you like eventually.
  5. There are five rules to this garage game, and that’s the maximum number of vehicles you may submit for each section.

And here’s my first selection; I’ve harped on it a few times here previously. It’s most fitting with my Nineties sensibilities, two-tone desires, and love of special editions. It’s the Mercury Villager Nautica, which was the fanciest Nissan Quest money could buy. Downsides include rust resistance, and a VG30 rather than VQ30 (it has a timing belt to change). They’re rare and worthless.

It was tough to pick just one more favorite to feature, but it has to be one of these. Another Nineties luxury wagon, Chrysler’s Town & Country. Lace alloys, gold scripts, and ruched leather abound in this fully-loaded van. Special love goes to the purple and gold combination shown here. They were also available in all-wheel drive, but that might be asking for too much these two decades later.

What are your van selections for the Crapwagon Garage?

[Images: GM, Isuzu, Ford, FCA]

Corey Lewis
Corey Lewis

Interested in lots of cars and their various historical contexts. Started writing articles for TTAC in late 2016, when my first posts were QOTDs. From there I started a few new series like Rare Rides, Buy/Drive/Burn, Abandoned History, and most recently Rare Rides Icons. Operating from a home base in Cincinnati, Ohio, a relative auto journalist dead zone. Many of my articles are prompted by something I'll see on social media that sparks my interest and causes me to research. Finding articles and information from the early days of the internet and beyond that covers the little details lost to time: trim packages, color and wheel choices, interior fabrics. Beyond those, I'm fascinated by automotive industry experiments, both failures and successes. Lately I've taken an interest in AI, and generating "what if" type images for car models long dead. Reincarnating a modern Toyota Paseo, Lincoln Mark IX, or Isuzu Trooper through a text prompt is fun. Fun to post them on Twitter too, and watch people overreact. To that end, the social media I use most is Twitter, @CoreyLewis86. I also contribute pieces for Forbes Wheels and Forbes Home.

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  • Mikeg216 Mikeg216 on Jun 28, 2018

    Eagle summit awd Isuzu oasis

  • Turf3 Turf3 on Jun 28, 2018

    1961-65 Corvair Greenbrier or Corvan. Indestructible, easy to repair, good space efficiency, brakes superior to many of today's vehicles. You would not believe the stuff I have overloaded one of these with.

    • JohnTaurus JohnTaurus on Jun 28, 2018

      The Rampside looked incredibly useful, and an excellent solution for loading cargo, given the rear engine design. Very neat vehicles, for sure. You could get an unrestored one (i suggest looking in Oregon or Washington, or the southwest like Arizona, etc) for $2k or so, and spend $5k getting it fixed up and ready for the road, so I do buy the $7k budget on this one.

  • Theflyersfan Pros: Stick shift, turbo wagonExtra tires and wheelsBody is in decent shape (although picture shows a little rust)Interior is in decent shapeService records so can see if big $$$ is coming upCan handle brutal "roads" in Uganda, Rwanda, and Tanzania, although the spare wheels and tires will be needed. (See picture)Cons:Mileage is high Other Volvos on the site are going for less moneyAnyone's guess what an Ontario-driven in the winter vehicle looks like on the lift.Why wasn't the interior cleaned?Clear the stability control message please...Of course it needs to cross the border if it comes down here. She lowers the price a bit and this could be a diamond in the rough. It isn't brown and doesn't have a diesel, but this checks most TTAC wagon buyer boxes!
  • Spookiness They'll keep chasing this dream/fantasy*, but maybe someday they'll realize their most valuable asset is their charging network.(*kind of like Mazda with rotary engines. just give up already.)
  • MaintenanceCosts If you really really want a stick-turbo-brick, damn the cost, this one might make a pretty good starting point for an overhaul/restoration. But the cost will be such that you better be very committed to the concept.
  • Kwik_Shift_Pro4X Style wise I'll give Volvo props for making boxy sporty. I would love one like this, but too much money pit potential.
  • Jbltg Nope.
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