Earlier this week, those of you who have a difficult time with Mother’s Day shared your strategies for making the day a little less painful. Here’s what you told us.
Avoid Social Media
For anyone who suffers on Mother’s Day, Facebook and Instagram are a minefield: picture after picture of smiling faces at Mother’s Day brunch and posts focused on moms who have good relationships with their kids. Reader greenamerican advises:
The fact is, you’re not going to miss anything important by going offline for a day or two. If you have push notifications for social media, make sure to turn them off so you’re not tempted to log on.
Remember Your Loved One
If your mother, child, or partner has died, Mother’s Day can be excruciating.
If you’ve lost your mom, you might find comfort in taking the time on Mother’s Day to remember her and everything she meant to you. PhlegmFatale offers:
You don’t have to engrave a bench to pay tribute to your mom’s memory. Visiting where she’s buried, listening to her favorite music, swapping stories with family, or simply taking a moment to pause and think about her are all ways that might help you get through the day.
If you’ve lost a child, reader AVDawn has a recommendation:
If you’ve lost a partner who was a mother, you might consider spending Sunday celebrating them with your children. Depending on the kids’ age, you can enlist your kids’ help in figuring out how to spend the day.
Celebrate Another Mother Figure in Your Life
Mothers aren’t always our biological moms: many of us have someone else in our lives like an aunt who always answers the phone, mentors us in our career choices, or a neighbor who keeps an eye out for us. Focus on the mother figures in your life and acknowledging all they do for you. NopeNopejustNope says:
If you know you’ll be spending the holiday with your partner’s mom, but you don’t view her as a mother figure, HesterMofet has a trick to help you reframe the day and get through it:
If you don’t have a mother figure to celebrate, you might expand your definition of what a mother is to women in general. You can volunteer at a women’s shelter or other organization or send texts to important women in your life.
Practice Self-Care
Self care is important any time, but if this day is rough for you, it’s essential. Plan a day full of your favorite activities, like a marathon of your favorite movies with your favorite snacks. Or treat yourself to something new, like taking an art class or a new hiking trail. The goal is to distract yourself with things you enjoy. Reader LarsVargas needs $20 million and a nap suggests another approach: treat it like any other day and go about your weekend routine.
Whether you decide to do something special or not, you can still focus on the good things in your life, as whatdidyousay11 proposes:
Whether your mom has died, you don’t have a good relationship with your mother, or you’re not able to be one and want to, knowing that you’re not alone and having a few ways to handle the holiday will hopefully help.